If you haven't heard, yesterday the Obama campaign "leaked" the information that, if elected President, Barack Hussein Obama will appoint a certain woman as Ambassador to Great Britain.
I'm laughing again, really.
Only a dimwit would entertain such an idea, and only a dimwit would fail to see just how manipulatively calculating is the timing of such an announcement. Having forfeited the opportunity to wrap up the gender vote by the selection of Hillary as his running mate and, instead, choosing the most cynical and sarcastic Senator Joseph Biden (who, by the way, hails from that state most notorious for its courtship of exploitative credit card companies - just look for "Delaware" on the address of your plastic), Obama now migrates from the ridiculous to the absurd - "Oprah Winfrey, Ambassador to Great Britain."
I'm not just laughing; I'm fighting myself not to use an expletive intensifier to emphasize just how funny that is.
What is Obama thinking? Surely he does not not think that Winfrey would seriously consider such an offer; she'd be eaten alive and the laughing stock of intellectually astute and cultured Britons. "Out of her league" would be the understatement of the year in such a scenario, and what an embarrassing development for any thinking American. Besides, Winfrey herself would consider such an appointment a "step down" -
I thank President Obama for his confidence in me, and I'm honored that he would consider me for such a high responsibility to our nation, but I think that I can do more good for the American people in my current role.
While Barack's at it, and since I know he reads and cares greatly about this blog, I have other recommendations for him:
- Joint Ambassadors to Zimbabwe - Angelina Jolee and Brad Pitt
- Ambassador to Iran - Barbara Streisand
- Ambassador to Germany - Steve Spielberg
- Ambassador to Saudi Arabia - Bill Maher
- Ambassador to Syria - Michael Moore
- Ambassador to Space - Johnny Depp
- Secretary of State - Susan Sarandon
- Secretary of Labor - Willie Nelson
- Secretary of Education - Howard Stern
- Secretary of Defense - Martin Short
- Secretary of Commerce - Fi'ty Cent
- Secretary of the Interior - Martha Stewart
- Director of Food and Drug Administration - Robert Downey, Jr.
- Presidential Press Secretary - Chris Rock
It gets funnier, doesn't it?
Frankly, I am not just laughing, I would be in a state of nauseated embarrassment if Oprah Winfrey became Ambassador to Great Britain. How could that nation take such an appointment seriously? They would be laughing, too, at us, and rightly so.
No, on second thought, I don't think the Brits would be laughing; I think they would be insulted, probably even angered, by such political tomfoolery and diplomatic impropriety
Maybe I shouldn't be laughing either.